Begging For His Love

Am i really so desperately in need for someone to be by my side that i willing to be with someone who doesn't love me? Isn't it ironic that, that person keep telling you that there's actually no Hope for such a thing and even though you, yourself, keep telling yourself that there are no Hope for such a thing for both of you. Why do i still begging for his Love that actually someone else can give to me?
As one door closes, another opens... I do believe this but why do i keep closing my heart for another chance even though i know that i don't exactly have any Hope for this one chance that im sticking to..

Lullaby....

Catch a Falling Star and put it in your pocket, Never let it Fade away.
Catch a Falling Star and put it in your pocket, Save it for a Rainy day.
For Love may come and tap you on the Shoulder, some Star-less night.
Just in case you feel you wanna Hold her, you'll have pocketful of Starlight!

For I Live For My Love....Cos Deep Down Inside, I Still Believe In True Love.

For Love Is The Star Of My Darkest Night, The Light Of My Life...

GB Ipanema!!!!! Give me one Pleaaaaase!!!!

Gosh! Im so in love with GB Ipanema Sandal & flip flop!!! Now i have 3 pairs of GB Ipanema, but still.... i want like..a LOT! Purple 'Alto verao', white/purple beach flip flop & purple-blue Star Thong flip flop now in hand. Im thinking about getting the new Star Sandal now.... I wish, i wish.....

Human Nature

Sometimes its kinda funny the way people or 'us', treat each other.... You know, about 'goodness' and 'rudeness' of others. Is it human nature to treat 'someone' with politeness or ask softly when the person need something from the other someone? And the opposite when 'that other someone' ask them question that require their reply or 'attention'?

But sometimes people speak rudely without any reason, only themselves and God knows why. I try to 'get away' from all this kind of 'life' but, like my close friend said to me 'you should never run from problem or trouble, but face it. Then you will learn how to handle it. Its only gonna make you stronger than before.'

One more interesting fact, people will not see the goodness you have done to them. If there are thousand goodness in you and only one 'imperfection' in you, they will only see the 'imperfect' in you. Im not saying all are like that but most of the people...i think i read this somewhere in the bible, something about what JC said... And im not saying that i only see the goodness in people, i am sooooo bias, if i dont like someone, i will not see any 'good' of that person... Kinda 'cruel' but i dont want to take a risk if its about friends. We'll never know what 'kind' of friend we meet out there...

Life is really funny........

Farmer's Life

I went back to my 'home-sweet-home' hometown last friday with my sister. Nothing much to do except relaxing and chit chatting that day. We arrived around 2pm. First thing that cross my mind after i greet my granny is 'Ma, sa lapar!' means 'Ma, im hungry!', then she told me to check in the kitchen, she already cooked something Hahaha...how selfish i am. But i did miss her cooking even though im not really into that day's menu.

The next day, i woke up late as usual.. hahaha without brushing my teeth or changing my 'pj's, i join my grandparent & the other relatives to plant paddy seed. The scenery here taken around 8am....And this called Mangasok, our traditional way of planting paddy seed before tranfering it to paddy field. This is what i called back to basic....

See, i didnt put anything before joining 'the team' not even a lotion or cream to my face and this is what i get.. It feels like burning!! Ouch! Serve me right! LOL

De-Activate 'Myself'?

I de-activate my facebook's account last night... I feel like im giving up... Feel like i wanna be left alone. Feel like i totally de-motivated, totally de-activate... I know the reason, and im sure thats the reason.. Im just hoping that God will show me the way, the right path. Pray that He will guide me thru the way..my journey, and i hope i will be strong. All that left is Hope.... & Faith.

My Evil Coward Pup!

Cute lil' fella here, i call her Notty...But my friends call her CC, short name for CC Babcock. You know, CC Babcock from The Nanny series.. I have no idea why they call her that (i guess because she's very annoying)...Just like~ i have no idea at all that she gonna be a very very evil but cowardy dog... Why did i say that? Cos.. First, she's very good with the fetch games and run away with the stick. Second, she will try to catch any small animal (bird, rat..etc) & insect (dragonfly, cockroach..etc) & then leave them to rotten..then you know she succeed in that. Third, everytime she hear a thunder, she will run inside the house and hide (with the mud and all~ you know she's inside when you saw the pawprints..), and its not easy to make her go outside. And she love to jump or lick you after trashing the rubbish!!!!! Arghhh! Smelly!
This is she now, after almost a year.... very skinny dog. I thought she gonna be 'big', atleast thats what the sales told me, 'cross-breed with German Shepherd' duh..!! Give her more than enough food but still...hmmm...
Guess i have to wait and see for a 'miracle'...

Arggggh! Why cant i be 'Normal'...?

Seriously, i just started socializing then its just stop.
What happen exactly? Is it me? Well, whatever it is..its must be me *sigh*... Why cant i be just like the other clubbers? Having fun, drinking.....dancing and stuff.. you know, stuff. Every time i go to a new club, 1st thing that will cross my mind-when its gonna be over- i know, i know... thats sux. Usually i will bring my camera & if im not mistaken, there are only 3 clubs that i went twice... the others? Guess what.. Once is enough.
---> That pic, we took at The Firefly Club, we crash somebody's birthday party and we dont know who the hell is that girl in the middle. Apparently, our names are not our own name that night...But im grateful to have friends like this...Luv 'em! At least they are still around, even though i dont really enjoy the environment...at least they make the best Girls Nite Out!
<--- The only & crazy sis that make me feel 'normal'-my crazy cousin! Gosh! Wish she was here but too bad she working in Singapore. Hope i can visit her someday!! Im having so much fun 'chatting' with her just now-via the net... Sharing stories & she make me LOL! Need her advise bout this girly stuff, im sux at this! I started to notice this last year when every girl wants look pretty but im trying to look 'macho'..what a crap! Just imagine there were roses around you but then there this one grass sticking out from the beautiful roses, that really spoil the view.
Or am i trying to hard to please everybody? Thats one thing to think about... may be im still searching & knowing 'myself'? If i dont like it, then why force myself to like it? Hmmm......will keep that in mind. Cant wait to see my cousin in July though!!!